Hello my name is Pepper and I’m a Bad Dog.
I am trying really hard to be supportive for my person now that she is single, but apparently I’m going about it in the wrong way. Today, when I was in the midst of stalking some geese by the river, I noticed a very attractive man jogging down the levee. I thought to myself, “Hey! That guy likes to jog and so does my person…. I should get them to meet!”
He was jogging pretty quickly so I knew I had to act fast before he got away. So I ran up to him, hopping up and down like a like a drunk rabbit, and tried to steal his water bottle. I thought if I took his water bottle and brought it it to my person, then she could give it back to him and they could talk. Perfect plan.
Well, I couldn’t get his water bottle out of his hands, as he was using some very advanced evasive maneuvers, and then my person came over and was not impressed with my strategy. I tried barking a little to see if that would get them to play together, but that didn’t work either. The man was very nice and said I was cute, but my person seemed pretty annoyed. She then put my leash on and took me home.
She tried to tell me something about being more “subtle” but I don’t know what that word means. I will have to Google it later.
I will try to be a good dog tomorrow.